I'm LInda ford, eternal optimist, lover of love, hopeless romantic, so that we can all come to truly know our worth.
If you want to have a great relationship with someone, you have to bring your WHOLE SELF to the table.
If you had told me that at the age of sixteen (the age I first started dating), that I wouldn't find the love of my life until I was forty-five, I think I would have curled up in a ball and cried.
But that's exactly what happened to me. It would take me that long to finally figure out who I was, and what I wanted in a relationship.
From the age of 16 to 45, I was never without a man in my life. I never had trouble getting dates and having boyfriends. I was either dating, living with someone, or married. And I would never leave a relationship until I knew I had another one to hop into.
I had purposefully set it up that way because I was terrified of living without a man. I believed that I had to have a man in my life to feel complete - to be happy.
I've been through two divorces and one lengthy live-in relationship, and many other shorter relationships. And the men I hung out with ranged from decent to dysfunctional.
If I look back on those years, the persistent thread was that always running through my relationships was that my partner's life always took prominence over mine, not because they were demanding or dominating, but because I never knew how to think about my life independently of a man. I never had real goals and dreams for myself. I didn't know what I wanted, because I never thought about myself very much in that way. All I really wanted was someone to take care of me.
And probably like you, it has been one rollercoaster of a journey. I've had great and not so great relationships. I've been loved, cherished, cheated on, dumped, duped, gaslighted, and left with a terrible relationship hangover. I know this subject really well. But I bounced back and finally landed on my relationship feet.