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Becoming a coach fifteen years ago was one of the most profound decisions of my life.

 

I knew I had found my calling – my vocation. Little did I know that this entrepreneurial journey I was about to embark on would also become a powerful catalyst for my own personal and spiritual awakening.

I would soon discover that this beautiful work I was being called to do, would demand so much more of me than just being a great coach.

You see, there was this other matter of how to find clients and make money – how to let the world know I existed. I knew nothing about the world of marketing, messaging, or sales. And then there was the technical stuff – I hadn’t a clue how to build a website or create a newsletter or set up operating systems.

 

But as frustrating, overwhelming, and challenging as all of this was, I somehow knew that these were skills I would eventually figure out. I was resourceful. I could find someone to help me. They were the least of my problems.

But who was going to help me with my lack of confidence about putting myself out there?

How was I ever going to get clients and make money? I was so afraid of being criticized, and rejected, and what if people thought I wasn't a very good coach? What if they found me boring?  My website may have looked great, but who was going to cover up the deep insecurity I felt about my worth and value? How was I ever going to disguise the energetic part of me - that part I just couldn't hide.

I was living a Jekyll and Hyde existence

The odd thing was is that there was a part of me that wanted to put myself out there when I thought about how I could coach and help others, but there was also another part that closed me down and was forever telling me:  

  • You’re not ready yet, it’s too dangerous;

  • You’ll be laughed at and no one will take you seriously.

  • Other people are so much more qualified than you, so why bother?

  • You should take another workshop before you launch yourself.

 

And so began my Jekyll and Hyde phase that would last for seven years. I could sense a part of me that wanted to come into full view, but another part that retreated into the background. There were days when I would come up with a great idea and then no sooner talk myself out of it – I was always second-guessing myself.

 

And this pattern of self-sabotage and hiding out left me feeling frustrated, sad, and painfully under-utilized. I began to wonder what was going on with me. What was at the bottom of my insecurity and self doubt?

What Breaks my Heart

 Over the years I’ve discovered that my experience is not uncommon. I meet so many women who have a strong desire to help others through their coaching – and who also desire to have a business that attracts clients and makes money, but who also struggle with a lack of confidence about putting themselves out there. So many of them are not coming into full view – so many of them have the handbrake on.

 

And the sad truth about these women is that many of them are smart, talented, hard-working, highly intuitive, and wise – many of them have been on a spiritual and personal - development journey for a long, long, time. These women know so much. And yet! They still don’t believe they are ready or qualified to put themselves and their work out there.

 

They continue to sit on their ideas instead of sharing them, they’re afraid of being judged and rejected, they're caught up in the perfection and comparison trap, and they are forever over-analyzing themselves with excruciating detail - always thinking of themselves as an imposter.

 

I know a thing or 2 about Transformation.

I no longer hold myself back and let fear stop me. I have co-written a Kindle best-selling book: Women and Confidence: The truth about the lies we tell ourselves; I have co-created two successful online programs called: The Confident Coach and If I'm so smart then why don't I feel more confident? 

 

And for all of these projects, I've had to use my voice, develop a point of view, share my opinions, produce videos, interview experts, speak at seminars and workshops, and put myself out there. I finally released the handbrake.

 

Where Soul Meets Strategy

 

My transformational journey has been about integrating two important paths. The path of strategy and the path of the soul. It’s where soul meets strategy, and it’s at the heart of my work today with coaches.

 

What I discovered was that for many years, I was putting business strategies ahead of doing the deep inner foundational work of connecting with who I really was as a coach. I wasn’t working with the right clients and neither was I confident in my own methodologies instead always distracted trying to imitate other coaches believing that if a business strategy worked for them it would work for me.

 

And then there were times when I would drop all the strategies and just focus on doing inner work. I discovered that focusing on one without the other never worked, but when I put the two together - bingo! that's when things began to change for me.

BRAND NEW ONLINE PROGRAM - COMING NOVEMBER 2021!

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This program covers every dimension of what is required to build and sustain an impactful coaching practice.  This program is a real gift for coaches who are just building a practice or for the seasoned coach who wants to create even greater impact with clients.

Dr. Dicken Bettinger

3 Principles master trainer and educator, global webinar and seminar leader, and co-author of Coming Home: Uncovering the Foundations of Psychological Well-being.

Take the CONFIDENT Coach QUIZ! 

How CONFIDENT are you (really!) as a coach?
 

10 game-changing questions that reveal the TRUTH about your level of confidence & how it's impacting your desire for more clients and a thriving business.

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